“The next p*ssy is the best p*ssy” – Advice when I got married

A new blog by good friends – Support the revolution of good loving

https://miniskirtessays.wordpress.com/2018/10/26/the-journey-begins/

Excerpt

“I never expected to get married.

For me marriage was something that only pretty women who wanted male affirmation did.

I was, and still am, a high achieving Black woman who put her education first all of her life. My goals were always with me in mind, never somebody else. Until I met somebody else.”

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NEW!! Top Tips Zokugculisa Isifazane by Confident Gal

 

Lumnandi ucansi.

Kodwa lumnandi uma laba abalwenzayo benalo ikhono lalento.

Njengoba ucansi luyindalo abantu bacabanga ukuthi yinto elula nje evetane yenzeke, kanti cha.

Luyi- skill ucansi.

Kufuna ulifunde njengokufunda ibhayisikile noma ukubhukuda. Awuvele nje uphonse umuntu kuswimming pool ucabange ukuthi uzontanta uma engazange afunde ngisho ida-damu leli.

Kanjalo ke nocansi webantu bakithi, ungaziphonsi phezu komunye umuntu ungazi ukuthi uzomgculisa kanjani.
Inkinga ukuthi iningi labalisa licabanga ukuthi into ehamba phambili kwisex yipipi. Kona siyavuma ukuthi limnandi ipipi elishisayo nkosi yam.

Kepha ipipi lilodwa aliwenzi wonke umsebenzi. Oku-worse ukuthi abesimame bayikhuluma lento uma bebodwa, bakhononde ngokuthi usibani-bani akakwazi ukumenza kahle.

Abanye ke osisi banamahloni ukumtshela ubhuti ukuthi abazizwa begculisekile ocansini.

Akuve kunzima emva kokukhwelana ukumbuka emehlweni umuntu umtshele iqiniso elithi: “Uyazini mfethu, ibipholile lento ebesiyenza. Angizwanga lutho nje futhi besengijahe ukuthi uchame uqede ngoba inkomo yami ivele yalala ubuthongo.”

Ku-worse futhi labo-brotherz abazitshela ukuthi banepipi elishisayo besebegibela phezu kwakho benze umbhedo.

Hhayibo, kunenkinga ezweni yobhuti abangakwazi ukugculisa inkomo ngoba bayazitshela.
Nanka amatiphu okugculisa isifazane.
TIP NUMBER 1: Okuhamba phambili yinkomo neclitoris, ubhontshisi wemizwa, hhayi ipipi!

Uma singena ekamelweni, ipipi lakho alingabiyiyonanto esemqoka.

Okusemqoka ukulungiselela inkomo, uyigculise, uze umuzwe owesimame eqala ekhala kancance ethi ‘Ah, ahhhh’.

TIP NUMBER 2: Ungayicindezeli kakhulu inkomo ne-clitoris. Iclitoris iyaqina njenge pipi, kodwa iqina ngokubrashwa kamnandi. Ungayicindezeli engathi upressa i-button leNokia yakudala. Yipresse kahle njenge pentshisi elivuthiwe elijuza amanzi.

TIP NUMBER 3: Yonke inkomo ifuna uyiphathe njengepentshisi elivuthiwe. Ipentshisi elivuthiwe uliphatha kahle ngeminwe, uma usulidla, ulidla kahle kamnandi ngoba lithambile, uyalikhotha ngesineke, ulokhe umile unensa ngoba phela limunandi bo. Awulijahi ipentshisi elivuthiwe. Kungani inkomo niyijaha pho? Uma ulicindezela kakhulu ipentshisi elivuthiwe liyapitshika, musa ke ukuyicindezela kakhulu inkomo- kubuhlungu.

TIP NUMBER 4: Inkomo idliwa ngesineke. Besengishilo ukuthi inkomo ifana nepentshisi elivuthiwe. Kubalulekile ukuthi uma udlala ngayo, uyidla, uzenolwimi oluthambile, umunwe ungawuqinisi. Lalela mina, kubuhlungu uma umuntu engenela inkomo ngolwimi oluqinile noma ekuhlokoloza ngomunwe eluqiniswe okogodo. Ngisho nje ngikhumbula omunye umlisa uwayilimaza iclitoris yami eyihlwampuza ngomunwe oqine okwashokhi wokubhala ebhodini. Kwathi angikhale. Kodwa phela sengakhula manje ngafunda ukuthi ngithi ‘Ima, kubuhlungu, ngcono siyeke’. Nawe mlisa, yeka. Uma ufuna ukuchama (ejaculate) kungcono umlinde usisi ahambe ngoba kuyacasula ukuthi umuntu afune kuqede yena yedwa wena inkomo yakho ibuhlungu.Okusemqoka ukuthi wena mlisa ungamufosti usisi ukuthi abekezele ukuze kugculiseke ipipi lakho.

TIP NUMBER 5: Ungajahi ukufaka umunwe wakho phakathi enkomeni. Iningi likhule umunwe ufakwa enkomeni zisuka. Cha bo bo, lokho kugculisa indoda. Qala ngokuyibrasha . Inkomo ayive ithanda ukuncengwa, ihlekiswe webabhemu. Kuyafana nje nokushelwa. Intombi ishelwa ngamazwi amahle kuzekuthambe inhliziyo. Kanjalo ke nenkomo yakhe owesimame – ifuna kube sengazuthi uyayishela ngokuyidlalisa nokuyibrasha ngolwimi uze uzwe usisi esememeza embhedeni ubumndani ethi “Oh yebo Mapholoba!” noma lesosithakazelo sakho. Musa ukuyijaha inkomo ufune ukuthatha amashortcut ngoba naku ucabangela lelipipi lakho, ipipi lizojabula uma inkomo imanzi, nosisi akazufuna nokukudedela. Ulwimi lakho aluthambe njengophaphe lwenkunkukhu. Ulwimi alungaqini kakhulu, aluthambe nje kahle bese uqala ngeclitoris. Asikho isidingo sokuthi uyiphenqe kakhulu inkomo ukuze uyikhothe. Be gentle. Shintsha shintsha izitayela zokukhotha, wenze ngokushesha, ubuye unense, kuzonmhlanyisa lokho usisi. Uma usufaka umunwe musa ukumbhebha ngayo zisuka. Umunwe kufanele ubrashe imilebe yenkomo, ubenesineke uzwe ukuthi inkomo iyaqala ukuba manzi.

Lento yokufaka umunwe enkomeni ebese uloko uhlokoloza inkomo ayisebenzi futhi iyisidina, senginitshelile mina ngoba phela izintombi zenu zisuke zinqena ukuni phoxa. Ayimnandi lento. Isineke, nokubrashwa kwemilebe ngesandla esithambale, naku ke okumnandi.

Uma uqondene nenkomo, bona ipentshisi elivuthiwe ngamehlo engqondo mfowethu. Uma ubona ipentshisi uzoyiphatha ngokufanelekile inkomo.

TIP NUMBER 6: Uma ufuna amahlanye, thanda amabele akhe, noma eme mpo noma elenga, wathande nje wena! Qala ngesandla esithambile emabeleni, musa ukuwa tofoza engathi udlala ngamaballoon agcewele amanzi. Amaballoon wawagcina ebuntwaneni, amabele omuntu ayinyama enemizwa, iza ngobunono demmet!

Amabele awafani wonke. Kodwa kumnandi ukuthi umuntu wakho awabambe ngendlela enothando. Amabele afuna uwabone njengesipho sendalo esimnandi, wathande. Izingono (nipple) azifani, ezabanye zinkulu, ezabanye ziqinile, ezabanye aziphakami ngisho nokuphakama. Hlonipha lonke uhlobo lwebele olubonayo, wathande wonke, ungabi yilamadoda athanda izinto zeporn, awafani amabele. Uma usisi esesho ethi “mmm mm kumnandi”, waqabule amabele, ube uwabrasha ngothando. Uma kumnandi usisi ozoyifaka ngokwakhe ingono emlonyeni wakho, uma isisemlomeni wakho ingono, yincele kancane kancane, uyidlalise ngolwimi kodwa hhayi isikhathi eside. Ingono iyakhathala ulwimi. Shintshanisa ngokubrasha ngesandla.

TIP NUMBER 7: Ingono (nipple) ayive imnandi, kodwa ungamani nje ungene ngokuyincela nokuyikhotha. Kufanele uqale ubrashe ibele lonke ulibrashe ngesandla esithambile. Kufanele kuqale kuphaphame imizwa yebele lonke mande ubhekane nengono iyodwa.

TIP NUMBER 8: Zibrashe zonke lezitho zomzimba wesifazane uzame ukuzidlalisa kanye kanye uma ukwazi. Ukuze kwenzeke lokhu, cela usisi ukuthi alale eceleni kwakho akufulathele. Wena lala emvakwakhe, ipipi lakho lizoqondana nezinqa zakhe. Muphulule umzimba wonke njengoba elele eceleni kwakho. Thinta inkomo, ubrashe iclitoris kahle, bese unyusa isandla umbrashe amabele, mqabule bese umbiza ngegama lakhe (“Nonku, Nonku umnandi”) ukuze azi ukuthi impela unake yena kuphela kulomzuzu. Mqabule ube ubrasha ibele. Uzohlanya usisi.

TIP NUMBER 9: Hlonipha isifazane. Awuzukwazi ukumgculisa umuntu wesifazane uma umcikela phansi.
TIP 10 FINAL MOST IMPORTANT TIP: BUZA IMIBUZO. Okuzomseqoka ngaphezu kwako konke ukuthi umbuze usisi ukuthi kusahamba kahle yini uma senisongene ngemizimba nijabulisana. Mbuze ngendlela ekhombisa ukuthi ufuna agculiseke naye. Nawe wena oyisifazane phendula uma ubuzwa. Akabhuli umuntu wakho, akazuphonsa mathambo ukuze azi ukuthi yini emnandi emzimbeni wakho. Ngakho ke, uma umuntu ebuza thatha ukuthi uyakuhlonipha. Iqiniso ukuthi Indoda engabuzi iyabheda ocansini ngoba ayizufunda. Umuntu wakho mbuze ngendla e-sexy njegokuthi “Akuve kumnandi ukudla inkomo yakho, ngichazele ukuthi ikuphi kona ebekumandi kakhulu”. Nawe sis musa ukubanamahloni, isho uchaze ukuze nawe ulibone lelizulu elincane.

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Wangiphoxa by ex-Lover

Angeke ngikhohlwe. Wagibela amatekisi amabili uza eflatini.

Ha, udoja emsebenzini, in-between amameeting. Hey, what happened to you… kodwa ke, indlela owawungakwazi ukuzibamba ngayo uma ucabanga mina, ngacishe ngakuthanda.

Anyway.

Wafika wabhaza i-intercom, ngikulindele, nganginervous. Of course, sasingazani ngaleyondlela. Kodwa sasiswazana, mangithi, amagazi ayezwana, imizimba yayifunana.

Funny, ya, wawungenza nervous.

Ngathi uma ngivula i-trellidor, wangibamba okhalweni wangipushela odongeni. Thixo. Umlomo wakho weza, amehlo ami esevaleke kancane, inhliziyo ishaya. Simakade.

Wangiqabula.

Ngenyusa isandla, ngakusondeza ngithinta izinwele. Dark, njengentshebe yakho.

Saqabulana, njengoluju lugeleza, your kisses.

Saya ekameleni. Kwasala phansi konke okuyingubo.

Wathi uyalithanda idilosi elihle. Wangitshela sisathumelana ama-SMS.

That’s the truth. Ama-SMS. Yaqala lapho into yethu.

Intombi yakho yayingekho, wawubhorekile. Nami wayengekho owami.

Kwafanele ngiyigcine ngaphakathi lemfihlo. Ngakhetha ukungayithi vu ngisho nakubangani bami.

Well. Kuthiwa its complicated.

Wangikhombisa ukuthi isifazane nesilisa siyakwazi ukuhlangana ngendlela enomlingo, ngendlela evutha isimanga.

Wangingena ngimanzi. Sishibilika, sincibilika.

Wangingena ngashushu. Izidonga ngaphakathi zidilika.

Umnandi. Mangithi- wawumnandi.

Ngangithi mhlawumbe siyophinde sihlangane. Siphinde esakwenza ngalelalanga.

Kubuhlungu ke guy, ukuzwa ukuthi yinto yakho vele lento yamaSMS ashisayo. Yi-strategy sakho esaziwayo.

Ngoba phela guy, ngayibona owayithumela kumngani wami iSMS.

It’s just ubengazi ukuthi nami ngidlule kuwe.

Wow. Wangiphoxa. I thought you were my little secret.

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Lapho ake Ema Khona by Anna Rudo

Ngiye, noma ngingayi?

Lowo yiwona mbuzo owawumudla ngaphakathi uPastor Philasonke Radebe, ngenkathi ephuma embhedeni ngeSonto ekuseni. Ubuthongo besebukade buphelile ngenxa yokushisa kwelanga langoDecember.

Amashidi ombhede eshwabene engathi aphuma emlonyeni wethole, kusho kona ukuthi sekudlule izinsuku engazihluphi ngokundlula umbhede. Wathi jeqe amehlo kwincwajana ehlezi phezu kwekhabethe eliseceleni kombhede.

Waphakama embhedeni wayovula amakhethini; ukukhazimula kwesibhakabhaka kwamhlaba amehlo wacwayiza, kuzwakala umsindo wezinambuzane namaxoxo.

Ngaphandle ingadi yayigcwele amaxhaphozi emvula yangayizolo, kodwa phakathi kukhala ibhungane, kusho kona ukuthi umaMfundisi, uPortia, uphume ngomnyango engamazi noma uyophinde abuye yini na.

UPhilasonke wazizwa ecabanga amazwi kaReverend Joel Shabalala, umsunguli weTrue Faith Ministries, ngenkathi efikile ngolweSine ezomtshela ukuthi incwajana le izofundwa enkundleni yabefundisi bebandla. “Angiwafuni amahemu-hemu azolahla ibandla.”

Uthe esehamba wamyala ngaleyondlela aziwa ngayo umRev ethi, “Ushefe phela ndoda, kufanele uyidide i-enemy uma ihlasela umuzi wakho. Musa nawe ukuba yile sipoki obubeka ngathi usisona. Khumbula amazwi kaMatewu ‘Gcoba ikhanda lakho, ugeze ubuso.’”

Washayiwa amahloni uPhilasonke. Wayeziqhenya phela njengomjitha-mfundisi wesimanje-manje oneminyaka engu30 kuphela, ongasoze awugqoke ukhololo.

“Ngiyezwa baba,” esho emvalelisa umRev omkhulu.

Wayenalo ke pho umRev ikhono lokutinyela ngezwi ebese ekuhlekisa. Ngenkathi uPhilasonke ethatha ubuholi beStudent Christian Organisation (SCO) kaStandard 10 e JC Nzima High, wangena ngaphansi kwephiko lakhe umRev.

Ngalezozinsuku yena nabanye abazalwane bebandla labafundi abasindisiwe lalizimisele ukungena ngesango elincane ezulwini ngokuziphatha kahle ikakhulukazi ngasocansini.

“Ishidi longashadile malibe mhlophe bazalwane” wayesho ngezinsuku zakhe sashumayela uPhilas enkonzweni yabafundi beS.C.O.

Kuyothi lapho abanye o-brother behlulwa yimizwa, uPhilas abalawule ngomthandazo weHubo 119 vesi 9: “Bawo malibe yi-stop sign engcwele izwi lakho. Sihlenge enkohlakalweni. Iba yileyo shawa ebandayo Moya oyingcwele.”
Yena nentombi yakhe yokuqala, uZandile Mbambo, babeyisibonelo kubanye abafundi bezimisele ukulinda baze bashade.

Kodwa iqiniso ukuthi umlilo wemizwa wawuloke uvutha kubo ngenxa yothando.

UPhilas wayethi uma elele ebusuku alubone ngamehlo engqondo usuku labo lomshado bezinikela ngemizimba.

Noma engakaze ahlangane nowesifazane ngaleyondlela, wayenesiqiniseko sokuthi ngalobobusuku babezoqhuma izilwimi zoMoya.

Wayezibona esingathwa amathanga afudumele kaZandi, umthondo wakhe uncibilikelela ngaphakathi kwendawo yakhe emanzi, bendizele ezulwini elincance. Lemicabango yayiyimfihlo yakhe yedwa uPhilas, ethandaza njalo ukuthi inkosi imuhlanze kulesono senyama nemicabango.

Babesinda nje ngoba bethanda ukufunda kanti futhi abazali bakaZandi babengazwile.

Ukuqeda kwabo izifundo zesikole bathatha izindlela ezingafani, baze bahlukana. uZandi wathola ibhasari yokufunda iBCom Accounting eNyuvesi yaseKapa, waze yena uPhilas wakhetha ukuya eBible College, wazinikela kumsebenzi wenkosi, ebandleni likamRev.

Nokho bazama ukuxhumana noZandi kepha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi izincwadi namaphonecall aya ngokuncipha, uZandi engasavamile ukubuya ekhaya ngamaholide. Emva kweminyaka kwazwakala ukuthi uZandi wayiyeka inkonzo. Inhliziyo kaPhilas yabuhlungu ngoba wayengalilahlanga ithemba lokuthi bobuye babuyelane.

Kodwa ke kuthiwa uThixo nguye umhlahlandlela. Kungoko uPortia Nzimade wathola khona enkonzweni, bashada emva konyaka besazana.

Ngemini yomshado umRev wamemezela ukuthi leligama lithi Philas lishiyeka ebusheni, ukusukela manje nguPhilasonke lendoda ethatha uPortia njengomfazi.

Angeke kuthiwe umshado wabo wawuvutha amalangabi, nangona wayefanelekile uPortia. Okubalulekile ukuthi babewakha ngomthandazo umuzi wabo.

Kwakubahambela kahle kanti kuzothi kuqala unyaka lo kwafika umyalezo othi uZandi ubuyile ngakubo, ubulawa umdlavuza webele udinga umthandazo.

Mhlawumbe wayedidwa ukubuya kwesithandwa sakudala uPhilasonke kodwa lalingadluli isonto engayanga ukuyobeka umthandazo kuboZandi. Kancane kancane, ezinyangeni ezilandelayo, nemithandazo yomuzi wakwaRadebe yayisigxile kakhulu kulolusizi lengane yakwa Mbambo ebenelishwa elingaka.

Nawe ungumfazi mhlawumbe wawuzophelelwa ububele ubhale incwajana engahlukanga kule kaPortia: “Brothers and Sisters in Christ, I must seek your help as the enemy is misleading my beloved husband with emotional adultery.”

Washiya ikopi eceleni kombhede mhla ephuma emzini wakhe ekhala.
Kodwa incwajana lena yayingeyona into eyayimhlupha emoyeni ngalomhla evuka yedwa uPhilasonke.

Phela namhlanje umngcwabo kaZandile Mbambo.

Manje: aye, noma angayi? Yiwonambuzo obumudla uPhilas.

Zehla izinyembezi zendoda icabanga igugu lasebusheni balo; inhliziyo igaya izibozi.

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NINI? – By Restless Fire [Hot Confessions]

Hot Confession:

Kune outi engihlekisana nayo. Asithandani kodwa siyafunana. Lento sayiqala singanakile, sakudlala, ngoba vele siphuma esigodini esisodwa akubanga yinkinga kade engicela icell number. Kwasho ukuthi ngelinye ilanga wangithumela isms ekhononda ngokushisa kwelanga wathi into emsizayo nje ukuthi yena akagqoki lutho ngaphansi kwebhulukwe lakhe. Wangibuza ukuthi mina ngigqokeni. Ngahleka nami ngoba besidlali ngathi ‘nthng that cnt b taken off’. Kwabe ukuqala kwethu lezinkulumo zesex kwisms. Kwathi emva kwesonto mhlawumbe ngezwa manje ukutha cha phela sengimfuna okwangempela lobhuti angisakwazi ngisho nokulala ebusuku ngoba ngilinde amasms aphuma kuye ebe enikiwe lelokhono lamagama ngoba uyakwazi yena ukuheha uzeqhanyelwe uzihlalele embhedeni ufunda amasms. Ngathi kuye ngeke phela sengilifuna ngempela lelipipi akamusa ukunginunusela akenze phela sihlangane yenzeke lento. Waqala waya le na le, kodwa ephinde futhi engishaya ngawo lamazwi angivusa imizwi mhlawumbe athi ‘I am sure amabele akho aqinile manje, ngicela unginikele wona igoodnight kiss’ noma athi ‘by now umanzi noma kungathiwani ukube bengiseduze bengizoyikhotha uze umemeze’ kodwa angiqede amandla uma ethi ‘ufuna ngikubhebhe kanjani’. Sihlulwa yini pho ukuhlangana? Ukuthi unentombi akusiyo inkinga. Ngizolinda kuze kube yini? Okanye uyaphosisa ngekhono lakhe embhedeni?

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HARD TO FIND – BY NAUGHTY ANGEL [HOT CONFESSIONS]

HOT CONFESSION

Ngithanda indoda engisebenza nayo. Mude, namashiye amahle, neminwe emide ebonakalayo ukuthi ubhuti uyizanakelela. Ngelinye ilanga besihleli senza umsebenzi, eseceleni kwami, ngilizwa igazi lami ligijima uma esondela kimi ebuza imibuzo mayelana nomsebenzi. Uma enganakile, ngimubuka phansi phezulu, ngenyuke ngebhulukwe nomzimba wakhe njalo; amathanga, izinqa, umhlane, izingalo, intamo… Ngamehlo engqondo ngibone sengathi uzophenduka, angisingathe, angiqabule kamnandi, sibukane emhlweni singakhulumi lutho. Ngifise sengathi angalifaka ulwimi lakhe emlonyeni wami, ngizwe ukufudumala nobumanzi balo, alimunce okwebele, alikhothe okwento emnandi ezulisa ikhanda. Ngebhadi, angeke kwenzeke, ushadile.

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IMITHETHO YOKUDLA INKOMO (HAYI LEDLA UTSHANI) by Not Your Average Zulu Guy

1.Qinisekisa ukuthi inkomo yomgitshelwa imanzi.

2. Uma seyimanzi, yivule ngezandla zombili. Uma unesibindi faka ulimi
lwakho uma ungenaso faka iminwe emithathu bese umukhuhlakhuhla
ngayo. Uyifake, uyikhiphe, uyifake, uyikhiphe kuze kufike lapho ingquza
yomkhwelwa iba noketshezi. Qhubeka umukhuhle kuze kufike lapho inkomo
yakhe ithi hlwepe, hlwepe, hlwepe, umgitshelwa lapho usethuka engaqedi.

 

3. Ngalesosikhathi-ke umgitshelwa kufanele ukuba uselungele ukukhwelwa.
Qinisekisa ukuthi ipipi lakho liqhanyelwe. Uma liqhanyelwe lifanele

liqine, likhukhumale futhi libonakale.

4.Uma ipipi lakho lingakami kahle, mucele ukuthi alifake emlonyeni. Ungafosti.
Qaphela: ubumnandi bomlomo bungakwephula iqolo, uqaphele ukuthi
ungathululi isidoda ngaphambi kokudla inkomo.

5. Uma ipipi lakho selimi kahle, sekuyisikhathi-ke sokuthi uyijabulise inkomo.

6. Faka ipipi phakathi enkomeni kancane-kancane. Ukuqinisekisa ukuthi
ingene kahle yonke, vula amathanga omgitshelwa bese ubeka amadolo akhe
emahlombe akho. Lokho kubizwa ngokuthi ukungenisisa. Ngalesosikhathi
umgitshelwa kufanele akubize ngegama. Uma engakakubizi ngegama kusho
ukuthi awukenzi zona. Yehla kugibele mina!

7. Qhubeka uma kusahamba kahle.

8.Mawuchama kufanele uklewule njengembuzi ithelwe ngedokwe
elishisayo, uthi “Ngquza weeeeeee!!!!” Uma ukwazi thuka ungaqedi.

 

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